Slum Life

Dear journal,

Life has been awesome in our English slum. Some people would say our slum is run down, torn apart, strewn with feces, trash and rats, but not our’s. It’s warm and cosy and just right for four people. And by us, I meant Brains, Alan, Tin Tin and me. And we live such a cosy and rule free life that for a moment you could say that we are free people.

Every day is great here in this slum. Other people who live in British slums don’t have electricity, hot water or enough food, but we do.

Other times, Tin Tin would cuddle me and hug me and lie on her back, lifting me high up into the air. I would yell out that I’m flying, and Tin Tin would cheer in joyful response, telling me that I’m like a pelican. As a reaction, I would puff out my cheeks, then make a pelican noise, which would make Tin Tin laugh.

I would help Alan cook all the meals to feed all of us four. All the time, we enjoyed a meal of eggs and chips either for lunch or dinner, or for breakfast we would have cornflakes or toast. Sometimes, on days when we were bored, we’d dial the number of the takeaway service and order a pizza for us to share - with drinks! Life doesn’t get any simpler here than that, does it?

When we feel lazy, we like to sit on the sofa in our silent living room and just laze around doing nothing. After a little while, I would tickle Brains’ bare feet, to which he would giggle loudly, and then Alan would tickle Tin Tin, and then we would all tickle each other. Our other source of joy in this house includes the most comfortable, soft, springy bed in the world. It made the most wonderful trampoline, and we would bounce on it together, yelling and screaming in joy, until we fell in a heap on top of one another and laughed.

Then, at bedtime, after a cosy bedtime routine, we’d snuggle altogether in our big-enough-for-four, just right, soft and comfortable bed, and whisper goodnight to each other.

A slum is just right for all of us, and so homely anyone can feel welcome in this beautiful house.