Oi oi, Buddy here. You're a bit surprised that I can actually talk after all these years of remaining silent, but ever since filming on my similarly named movie ended in 1998, I understood what some of my fans got up to - especially one by the name of *censored due to the online privacy protection act*.
You see, ever since last night she's been crying her eyes out. She even didn't scream when she banged her elbow on the doorknob near the sofa where she always sat. My little chimp friend Maggie told me that it's what's called a 'Peeling Banana', which means there's a banana inside her that's peeling very slowly. It's got a thousand layers, she told me, and with each layer that got pulled off, she bursts into tears, just like my owner when she was proud of me for doing something remarkable, like choosing what movie I want to watch for movie night.
I mean, it's not fair! Us apes don't have to suffer a banana peeling inside us, do we? Nah ah, no, zilch, nada. My owner has told me the stories of when the banana inside her began peeling. Not only did she cry non stop, but she actually began to develop teen angst! Yuck! Even my little simian brothers and sisters didn't like it.
Not only that, but my friend began experiencing other symptoms of the peeling banana as well, such as terrible itching. The itching was so bad I thought blue patches would come up on her skin! But no, no blue itchy patches - or at least, that's what they told me according to ape legend. Some of us apes do suffer with colourful itchy patches when our banana peels, but me? No way! I'm a boy, I don't have a banana, only female apes have a banana.
With a thousand layers.
Well at least she isn't a moody old teen anymore...is she?
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