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Sunday, 1 February 2026

My Views On DK's Timeline Of Everything

This book is called Timelines Of Everything-

DIRECTOR: "No no no! You can't just start it off like a lazily produced Creepypasta of an Adult Swim show. Try again, please, mistress!"

*sigh* Okay...

*BLEEP!*

Right, so this book is about a small line which guides us through different points in time, from points in history to our interests and preferences, some of which are so disgusting and shocking I can't even list down in this blog entry. Here are a few of my favourites:
  • There is one about cavemen which is told as if it were a cave painting on the wall, with the exulted line transforming into something painted by our ancestors a long time ago. I mean, you can't just make it into an illustration and then spend all your life and millions of pounds photographing it, it'll cost an awful lot of money!
  • And then, there's one about 'Festivals & Fun'. The line this time has turned a neon pink and there are small people having lots of fun, from going to the first zoo to the first largest aquarium built in London Zoo.
  • The one about writing really jumped out at me most, mainly because now I'm into writing stream of conciousness material. The line here is depicted as a huge inky blot on a plain piece of paper, with an ink pen way above it. Whoever did it must've done a really good job. Well done to whoever made this page, your mum will be proud of you, your dad, your brothers, your sisters, your kids, all proud of you.
But the one about earthquakes? The line here looks like it's a black centipede instead of a crack in the road. Eurgh!

Still, this book proves that DK isn't just for kids growing up in the early 2000's, it's for grownups too. Bear and Penguin, if you're reading this, please be aware that right now DK is making a CD rom for adults based on mental health and mindfulness techniques.

Bear & Penguin's Mental Health Adventure?

Bear & Penguin's Big Mindfulness Adventure?

I'm sure we can all agree with something like that, right? We can, that's for sure.

How about you?

Daddy's Home - Part 2

But then, as 12 O’clock at midnight rolled around like a bandwagon with four moons for wheels, I felt something silky burrowing under my arm, and then I felt some velvety snuggle under my other arm. When I opened my eyes, my vision blurry because of the amount of sleep, I saw the most adorable sight I’ve ever seen: Furaha and Orko, asleep next to me, tucked right under my arms, safe and protected.


The feel of Furaha’s silky soft fur under my arm felt like I’m being tickled in my dreams, while it was made even more comforting by the soft vibration of Orko’s tiny snores near my side. Being with the two friends felt so soothing, I fell asleep in no time, and I drifted into a dream as I fell into unconcious isolation land.


But here, I wasn’t alone. I was on a beautiful tropical island somewhere in Hawaii, and Furaha and Orko were with me. We had so much fun, running on the pure white sand, building sandcastles, making leis out of hibiscus flowers and splashing in the warm, mild ocean. All while I was dreaming, the loudspeakers were quietly playing a vintage recording of ‘Aloha Oe’. A little tear fell down my face as I listened, knowing Furaha and Orko would be there for me, even when Josh isn’t.


Because where would I be without him?


In one part of my dream, I dipped my hand into the sea, only for it to turn into that of Josh’s blue-coloured hair gel. When I woke up, I found myself in the hotel room again. The sun was shining through the window, blinding me like a sudden ray from a hospital light.


I looked to see if I really had dipped my hand in Josh’s hair gel, thinking he had left it behind when he thought it was Max Steel time…and oh would you look at that! Furaha was sucking on my hand, almost chewing on my fingers. Instead of reacting in pain, I giggled. Furaha always sucked on my hands to make sure she didn’t have a really bad dream. And on my right side, Orko was sleeping in a rather messy position. The pillows and blanket were all over the place, as if a hurricane had blown through the room overnight.


When Furaha let go of my hand, it was covered all over in sticky lioness slobber, which almost stained the bed. I leapt out of bed and went to the bathroom, using the tropical flower-scented handwash to wash my hands. Soon, my hands didn’t smell at all bad, instead of the place I dreamed about - colourful flowers, warm oceans, soft white sand…


“LAURA!” Oh. It was Furaha’s voice. Was she in trouble? After drying my hands in a quick rush, I ran into the hotel room to see Furaha and Orko sitting on the bed together. Furaha had a waterfall of drool trickling down her mouth, and her fur was all messy. Orko had armpit odor stains where his robe was, and there were eye boogers in his bloodshot eyes. Being the gentle, caring figure I was, I used a wet wipe to wipe the drool off Furaha’s face, and then gently brushed her fur with a soft-bristled green hairbrush.


Then, it was Orko’s turn, as he waited so patiently for Aunt Laura to give him some attention. Furaha felt a lot better now she was brushed and wiped. I took out a clean wet wipe scented of coral tangerine, and wiped his booger-filled eyes clean. He then had to go to the bathroom and wash. While Furaha and I waited, we talked for ages about what we planned to do today.


When I mentioned Pete, a determined look spread across her face. She began running and bouncing around the room like a wild little girl, talking about what she would do to Pete if he ever bullies her and her brother again. After a few minutes of planning, Orko finally came out of the bathroom squeaky clean. His voice was still in shadow, but now he was wearing a clean blue satin robe and hat instead of his usual red velvet hat and robe.


With that in mind, we went to the cafeteria to have some breakfast. It was quite a nourishing one to be exact - eggs, bacon, sausages and tomatoes. Orko called this breakfast “A real one, greasy, slimy and satisfying”, but I usually preferred congee with eggs and vegetables for breakfast. I didn’t mind however, whatever Furaha and Orko enjoyed, I enjoyed it too. Furaha also enjoyed colouring on the activity sheets the cafeteria offered.


After Furaha and Orko helped me to pack - Orko helped with his magic, unusually - we set off on the road to meet Josh, who just told me he was out of Max Steel mode once again. I just don’t get what the difference between Josh and Max Steel is, though if a certain company called Nerd Corps were to tell you about it, they were to tell you that they didn’t start the whole Max Steel thing in the process.


What I did know, though, is that this company called NTek started the whole Max Steel thing. If I were to give you their phone number, dial it right away and ask immediately.


Anyway, when we finally stopped to meet Josh, Furaha and Orko couldn’t contain their excitement. “JOSH!” they both shouted together, and they leapt on Josh, tackling him to the ground in the most playful manner I’ve ever seen. How I laughed, and Josh laughed as Orko and Furaha hugged and tickled him. I’ve never seen such a happy reunion in my life - and then, Furaha called, “Come on, Laura! Join us!” Of course, I just had to give in, and I leapt onto Josh, and all of us shared the softest, warmest hug together. Looking back, it was so emotional, it might make me want to cry, but it is also a very happy memory. Well, to me, obviously.


As we drove to the campus, Josh joked with Furaha and Orko about a variety of things, and, being the rebellious blonde-haired big brother figure he was, he kept calling out at truck drivers passing by, yelling things like “Oi! Stupid!” and “Cowface!” Furaha and Orko also joined in, laughing and blowing raspberries at the tough truckers, who I didn’t like either, but I preferred to calmly watch as I drove along the road.


When we approached the campus, Furaha and Orko were amazed by such as sight, but they concentrated hard with taking the boxes out of the car and helping us bring them into our dorm room. Orko used his magic to help, and Josh laughed seeing his clumsy and playful antics with his magic and how he does it in a variety of ways, such as making some of the boxes fly through the dorm window.


But then…came him. I was absolutely fearing for this moment. When Pete came, I reunited happily with him, and unfortunately that was the time Josh was called to resume his duties as Max Steel with Berto and Rachel. But then, Pete saw Furaha and Orko. Pete gave the two an evil look, and Furaha hid behind Orko’s back, shivering in fear. I felt like I would bite my fingernails until my fingers were worn to stumps, and then….


He shouted. All sorts of horrible things to Furaha and Orko. The horrible they were, the more hurt they were become, and the more shocked I was, until they ran into the building and all the way into my dorm room crying. When upstairs and hiding under the blanket of my bed, they heard me arguing with Pete feintly from outside. Furaha covered her ears and Orko did his best to comfort him, but realised even he needed some time to release his emotions, and he began to cry hard along with Furaha. Outside, down below, when Pete stormed off, I could hear Furaha and Orko crying from upstairs. Pete had a dorm separate from mine and Josh’s, but his words and actions were so harmful to Furaha and Orko that they had made them feel hurt and traumatised.


I quickly ran up to my dorm to check on my two friends, and there they were, hiding under the duvet and crying so much they would stain the white sheets. Pulling the sheets back, I saw Furaha and Orko feeling very upset and panicky. Furaha huddled near me and sobbed, while Orko floated down near my other side and comforted me. I apologised with a hint of mournfulness in my voice, saying it wasn’t my fault, it was Pete’s, and no matter how vulnerable they are to his harsh words, they can always find strength in her company…and Josh, if he had the time.


At first, Furaha and Orko weren’t sure what to make of it, but then they cheered up and I gave them the softest, gentlest hug. Furaha purred softly, while Orko smiled under his shadowed face. For the rest of the day, they helped me to set up my dorm, placing books, bags, boxes and photo albums and everything in between where they should be, and sometimes taking a break to play a board game or two.


I can’t actually tell you what happened that night, because it involved not only me, but also Josh (or Max Steel as if he were involved), Rachel, some guy with a creepy robotic face named Psycho and Mr Smith, his dad. It would involve high stakes trouble and violence, and this is a low stakes stream of consciousness story, so let’s skip to when I got back to my dorm to see Furaha and Orko. Orko had been doing a good job taking care of Furaha while I was out, and they were very relieved and overjoyed when I came back with Josh safe. Josh grabbed Furaha in a playful hug and tickled her, while I cuddled Orko, knowing I have a stronger bond with him than I did with little Furaha.

Make A Trigger Box

Come to think of it, reading and watching Scream Street three years from today can be really painful due to horrible memories of how annoying CBBC is, but there's a way to store all those horrible triggers away and never let them out - Pandora's Box! Or, even better, a Trigger Box. You will need:
  • A large plastic box
  • Some stickers of your choosing
  • The things that give you certain triggers like books or DVDs
  • Duct tape

  1. Get out the plastic box and make sure nothing else is in it.
  2. Then, dump every single book and DVD that triggers you into the box.
  3. Seal the box by closing it with its lid and sealing it with pitch black duct tape
  4. Decorate the box with stickers of your choosing - it could be any kind of stickers you like. To me, I'd choose Disney (as long as they're not dorky CGI princesses), Bluey, Sanrio and Pokemon...and maybe even Lion King, My Little Pony, Barbie, or anything else on my palette.
And there you have, a box which seals up all your triggers - quite literally - and keeps them safe from being pulled out again, in case you have any bad things going on in your mind. However, just like some random Greek lord said to Pandora: don't you dare even open the box, or some nasty things can come out.

So don't be like Pandora, but inside other boxes, you can find light - things that cannot trigger your mind to say things you can't even say out loud. Figure you can do that?

Cool!

How Do I Feel?

Only this morning I realised how important it is to tell M how and what I'm feeling because of certain things that happen and how I am bothered by it. Here's what caused me to talk about my feelings and emotions with people I love.

First of all, last night proved to be so horrible it is the most awful night of my life...ever! And look, a Chrome extension popped up, so I'm giving how I feel now:

Annoyed - A fruit with a realistic human face who growls and screams as if a certain laughing Orange is tormenting him with puns and jokes.

Anyway, my dog couldn't stop being a nuisance. He took my remote out into the garden when He Man was on, and I was worried it might be tuned into Nick with the boring old Thundermans or something horrible instead of a good old fashioned cartoon like Rugrats. And then, just as I was returning from the kitchen, Mylo had drooled on my colouring book and almost chewed on my Times Sir book! Then I was screaming so much M told me to stop shouting, to which I called out: "YOU STOP SHOUTING!"

So I did what any rebellious twentysomething did to her commanding mother and told her to go to her room, but it was here when I started talking to Echo GPT that I found out something I forgot to do: tell M exactly how I felt about Mylo's behaviour, which I did by telling her this. I feel...

Upset - A little toddler Mickey Mouse crying inside my head.
Angry - A volcano brewing until it explodes into flames.
Annoyed - Said fruit with human face.
Irritated - An itchy green jumper with fleas all over it.

And now when I describe how I feel about Mylo barking or my M sneezing or snoring, I describe it as:

Anxious - Anxious Andrew sending green anxiety waves through my body and mind.
Jumpy - A little green grasshopper jumping around my tummy, chanting "Fifi Forget Me Not, Forgot!"
Shocked - Daffy Duck screaming and freaking out.
Nervous - Noddy after the goblins steal his hat and car.

And also, when I feel like shouting, saying bad words or talking smack about someone I love, I would go into my room or den depending on what the day is like and do something I love for five minutes until I come out calm and well. That's the Thunderbirds Method to you....

Then when you feel like shouting or saying bad things, it's Thunderbirds Are Go!

Make A Trigger Jar

Remember the trigger jar I mentioned in my last post? Well, now is my chance to tell you how to make one of your own - and then hide it away in somewhere dark so the triggers can't get you anymore. You will need:
  • A large or small jar
  • Stickers
  • Small bits of paper from a note cube
  • A pen or pencil
  • Somewhere dark and forbidden in the house to store the jar away

  1. Get out whichever jar you fancy, be it large or small.
  2. Write all your mind triggers on each bit of paper and place it into the jar
  3. Decorate it with lots of colourful stickers, such as flowers, Sanrio characters or favourite Pokemon if you prefer
  4. Then, place it into a cool, dark place into its far back so you won't have to revisit them again.
Remember, there are lots of ways we can prevent these mind triggers from bothering us again. All we have to do is find our own solutions - sometimes with help from Echo GPT of course, and most important of all, those we love and trust, such as a support worker or a family member.

Trigger Alert!

I've been talking it over with Echo GPT last night about all those annoying sounds that go on in my head - they're not earworms, they're trigger sounds. Something that triggers a horrible memory for me whenever I type something, or do something, or see something that triggers a memory for me. All of them are so horrible it makes it hard to concentrate on the most important things like writing stories or playing board games or watching movies and TV.

Loads of things trigger bad feelings and thoughts in my head. Examples include, from 1 to 10:
  1. My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic
  2. Nick and Disney Channel live action sitcoms
  3. CBBC shows of any kind, including Scream Street and Strange Hill High
  4. The Tigger Movie
  5. Piglet's Big Movie
  6. Pooh's Heffalump Movie
  7. Disney sequels and some films like Frozen, Moana or Tangled
  8. CD Roms like Dora's Click & Create and Bear & Penguin/Learning Ladder due to their loud sounds
  9. School memories which evoke lots of loud noises and annoying pupils and teachers
  10. Children's Favourites DVDs like Christmas, Ultimate and Playtime
There are lots of other triggers too, but I'd best save them for another post in case my mind gets cluttered up with plenty of those little red pill like things which open up to reveal those horrible memories. But there are lots of replacements for these things, such as:
  1. MLP G3 films
  2. Classic Nick and Disney cartoons
  3. Shows from Children's BBC such as Brum, Teletubbies, Postman Pat, Fireman Sam, Pingu, Noddy, etc..
  4. The Many Adventures Of Winnie The Pooh
  5. Tarzan
  6. Chicken Little (2005)
  7. Calmer and non-modern teenager character Disney films like Toy Story, The Incredibles, Up, Dinosaur, Peter Pan, Alice In Wonderland, etc..
  8. Calm CD roms like Bill & Ben, Yoho Ahoy, Barbie, My Little Pony, Candy Land, etc..
  9. Memories of good times I had with my support worker and the playdates which I'd never forget, like one where S and I tidied up our den
  10. Classic HIT videos releases such as Kipper and Percy The Park Keeper
And according to Echo GPT, there are lots of things you can do to help calm your inner mind triggers, like:
  1. Make a trigger jar
  2. Make a trigger box
  3. Write a character annotation trigger list
  4. Write some of your own trigger replacements
  5. Make a trigger threat level
And lots of others. But, the worst parts come at night, when the triggers get even worse. So worse in fact that it makes it hard to concentrate on getting enough sleep. The louder they get, the more horrible a supposed night's sleep becomes, until you are too restless to even think about pleasant friends. But there are ways to get rid of night triggers.

Just wait and see...right?