Things That Make Me Happy - Part 1

1.Water when I cough

2.Thinking up original stories

3.Listening to Westlife

4.Having a good cry

5.The ending montage of Shrek The Third

6.The amount of people reading my stories on my blog

7.The MST3K version of Teenagers From Outer Space

8.References to Sesame Street, Snoopy and Scooby Doo

9.Knowing I can see my characters any time

10.Writing stories for my blog

The Theatre Follies

One time, when my gang and I were exploring Rome, we came across a grand, majestic, circular building. It was a strange-looking theatre, like one we’ve never seen before.

“Let’s go in!” cried Bluey, “We might know the history of this theatre.” “Yeah,” said Tom Servo, “Who knows what this place will hold.” So off we went inside.

The hallways were dark and patterned with cobwebs. The screech of a bat made Crow scared, and Tin Tin had to hold Bingo’s hand because she too was frightened.

Then we had to go through a brightly lit hall of mirrors. At first, we all screamed, because our reflections were ugly, and the walls and floor were covered in mirrors!

But then we all laughed when we looked, and saw how funny we were - we were all wavy and divided and weird. Even Crow and Tom riffed on their own reflections.

At last, we reached the centre of the theatre. Tom found a light switch. Sure, the lights went on with a loud, ear splitting bang, but before our eyes was the most spectacular sight.

There were millions of chairs for the audience to sit, and in front of the auditorium was a stage with some unpainted, giant wooden props. That gave me an idea.

“Guys, why don’t we put on our own private show? We can do it as if no one is watching!” “YEAH!” Everyone agreed, so loudly that our voices echoed through the theatre.

So Crow and Tom did a really good but sometimes sloppy job of painting the sets, which were crudely coloured when you look at it this way.

The rest of us dressed in funny costumes and danced around the stage.

Bluey and Bingo made funny faces at each other!

Suddenly, we all felt hungry after all that performance and fun. “There must be some food somewhere,” wondered Brains, but then I said, “Let’s go into the cafeteria. All the meals are served there.”

So we went into the glistening blue walled cafeteria, and oh boy did we find such a sight - it was a table laiden with fried chicken, sausage rolls, cupcakes, ice cream, cheese sandwiches and pork cocktail sausages. Instantly, we got stuck in. It was so delicious, and Crow ate so much he could hardly squeeze out the door when we went back into the theatre.

In fact, we were so full from eating in the cafeteria, we all went to sleep on the stage.

We were sleeping for so long, we didn’t know that there was going to be a big show tonight…

Until we heard the sound of a gasping crowd of millions of people. We woke up to see a gaggle of actors standing around us. They went completely out of character when they saw us.

“My, my,” said one of them, dressed as a musketeer. “It seems these robots have painted the sets for our show!” Tom and Crow looked at each other in amazement.

“And it seems you have chosen the right clothes for our show too,” said one man, dressed as a pantomime dame. We all laughed at how funny she looked.

“And you, Sybil, you made the show completely possible!” said the lead actor, lifting my hand up as if crowning me in a tournament.

At once, the crowd stood up and cheered, and all my friends cheered too. I could hear everyone chanting my name loudly. I could feel deep success in myself and-

“SYBIL!”

It was Emily! She had woken me and my gang up. We were back in our room. It was morning. It had all been a dream. “Morning, Emily,” I said, “We just had the weirdest dream.”

“Well, whatever that dream was, I could hear you guys chanting quietly in your sleep. Let’s go down to the cafeteria to have breakfast, then we can go and check out the old ruins in the corner of Rome.”

“ROME?!” Crow and Tom yelled. They were so shocked, they fainted.

Somewhere In The Stone Age

Hello, everyone. My name is Jonah, and I would like to show you an alternate reality where my robot friends with a group of other friends in the Stone Age, when people like homo erectus ruled the Earth.

By using this special examination screen, we can generate years of time back to 2,000 years ago, when cave people ruled the Earth. Here we go!

FZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ…

Well, I never! That’s the hugest waterfall I’ve ever seen! All we have to do now is find Crow and Tom. Wait - I can hear them snoring. They’re in this cave over there. Let’s check them out.

Ah, here they are - all soundly asleep with their friends by their side - Sybil, Brains, Alan, Tin Tin, Bluey and Bingo.

Now, since it’s the time of Homo Erectus, they speak very differently. Listen to how they speak. Sybil and her International Rescue friends speak the kind of gibberish any H.E. speaks. Bluey and Bingo communicate in fierce barking. Crow and Tom don’t communicate in beeps and whistles at all, but since they are the first robots on earth, they growl. Not in a fierce way, but rather, in a friendly way.

As they wake up, Brains feels his tummy rumbling. It must be time for breakfast.

Off they go, climbing up the waterfall towards the deep bamboo forests of Asia. And do you know what they’re hunting for next? What I will tell you next will gross you out, so be careful…

Grub! I meant, insects. The delicate kind, the ones Timon and Pumbaa eat. Good thing they made bowls out of the bamboo on the trees, so they mash all kinds of delicious looking grub (except for tarantulas, they’re too hairy) into stew or soup.

Eating them can be a bit messy at first, but if you taste it hard enough, you might find they taste of chicken and those savoury snacks you buy at ASDA. Erm….how yummy! Ha ha!

Eating all these bugs has made our gang full, so they take a nap in the shade of the tree.

Sybil snuggles close to Alan. He’s the most protective of the group, and he treats Sybil like she’s his little sister. How cute!

Then, after their nap, they feel quite a bit groggy. You can tell - look at their eyes! They have mush and gritty stuff all around them. Sick!

So they head off to the river to wash all of the sleep out of their eyes and faces, and soon, all the mushy and gritty stuff is gone. But being around water, you know what that means, don’t you?

Yes! They splash and play in the cool water of the river, underneath the light of the sun. Their laughter echoes through the jungle as they relax and play in this cooling, natural substance.

Crow? He prefers to lie on the bank of the river lingering about, thinking about the simple pleasures of life - before television, or telephones, or apps or anything like that.

Now just hear them. There they are, standing on a cliff, but they are cheering and yelling over the victory of freedom - even Bluey and Bingo are howling, so loud it fills the whole jungle!

All this yelling and howling has made our band of heroes tired, so they retreat back into their cave for a well earned rest. You can tell: the sun is setting overhead.

And now, here they are. All fast asleep, without a care in the world, Sybil cuddled next to Tin Tin and - hey! Who’s foot’s in Tom’s face?

Well, never mind that. I can’t show you anymore. Seeing all this happiness has made me tired myself, so off I go to bed…

Goodnight.

Thank You, Mr Small

Let’s think back to when I was just a baby. At this time, Lady Penelope, my mummy, was watching me crawl along the grass in the park.

“You can do it, little one,” she smiled proudly, clapping her hands gently as I crawled around, giggling.

Then she heard Parker calling her. “It’s time, milady!” She knew she had some errands to run, but she was very happy she saw Mr Happy playing with Mr Small and Little Miss Tiny near the basketball court.

She asked the three Mr Men to take care of me when she had some errands to run. It was now their duty to teach me how to take my first steps.

Mr Small and Little Miss Tiny followed me as I crawled along the grass, but Little Miss Tiny struggled to keep up until Mr Happy took her in the palm of his hand and let her follow me from a distance.

And then, something truly remarkable happened. Can you guess what it is? If you can, then it won’t be much of a story, won’t it? Okay, here we go…

I suddenly stood up on my fingers and toes and started crawling like a weird creature. Mr Small’s jaw dropped to the floor, but Little Miss Tiny and Mr Happy looked at each other and cheered. “Hooray!” squeaked Little Miss Tiny, “She’s learning to walk!”

“Her bones are getting stronger,” examined Mr Happy, “And so it must be for the bones and muscles inside her fingers and toes. That’s why she’s walking so funny.” Mr Small started to giggle. “She’s walking like an elephant!” he laughed in a squeaky way.

But then, I approached the park bench. Mr Small stopped laughing and looked on curiously. Mr Happy held his breath. Little Miss Tiny almost started biting her fingernails.

I grabbed hold of the arm of the park bench. Mr Small gasped, and ran to Mr Happy for safety. “What’s happening to her?” wailed Mr Small. “A miracle,” smiled Mr Happy.

And that miracle started almost as instantly as Mr Happy thought it would be. I took hold of the arm of the bench, lifted myself up onto my feet…

…and then, for the first time ever, my legs felt strong enough to walk! Mr Happy looked on proudly, and Mr Small and Little Miss Tiny cheered and jumped up and down in delight.

But where would I walk to? That’s the question. I wish my mummy were here to-

But then, I heard a proud squeal of joy. “Come here, my baby!” It was my mummy, Lady Penelope, in proud tears as I stumbled towards her. As I fell into her arms she swooped me up and cuddled me. “My dear little baby has taken her first steps!” she sobbed proudly, “Thank you, my dear friends.” Mr Happy gave a thumbs up. Mr Small started sobbing comically, and even Little Miss Tiny felt all the feels.

“I can’t imagine how those Mr Men would help my baby take her first steps,” smiled Lady Penelope as she sat next to Parker on the bench, me sitting on her lap.

“‘Er legs are getting stronger every day, milady,” smiled Parker, “And now, I think today might be the day.”

“I know, it’s her moment of triumph. Although…” Lady Penelope felt there was something missing. “I wish the rest of International Rescue were there to see it.”

Then, she saw Brains, Alan and Tin Tin playing football in the field nearby, and knew she would have the opportunity to introduce my new walking skills to them.

“Excuse me, my friends!” she called. Instantly, Alan, Brains and Tin Tin stopped playing their game and rushed over to me and my carers. “Look at how brave my baby has been,” Lady Penelope declared, “She has taken her first steps.”

Brains gasped. “Aaaaaaw,” smiled Tin Tin. “Well, what are you waiting for?” smiled Alan eagerly, “Come on, let us see her first steps!”

So Lady Penelope put me down onto the grass, and I cut loose with my new walking. My three friends couldn’t believe how well I’ve developed. Brains was close to tears, and Tin Tin squealed in pride.

For the rest of the day, we all played together while Lady Penelope watched on. For now, she could well think back to the days of her own childhood…

…when she was just a baby herself, learning to walk. She could hear her mother’s gasps of delight, and her father encouraging her gently as she stumbled all the way towards her mother’s arms.

…And just like that, she could feel me run back into her arms, wanting a soft, gentle cuddle.

The All Important Symbol

Okay, ladies and gentlemen, if I want my stories in the mix, then I have this to show you. Introducing...THE ALL IMPORTANT SYMBOL! Here it is:

*FF*

And now, in Floella Benjamin style:

When you want to put fanfiction in your published books, you need to know that what you write is suitable for the audience who reads it. To help people understand if you want everything to make sense, you can look at the All Important Symbol.

This symbol has been classified: *FF*. That means you can still put your stories out to the world, without evoking the horrors of copyright.

The All Important Symbol is there to give you the chance to make the right choice.

Thanks for listening.

✅