K9's Favourite Song

10 Favourite Characters You Can Send Love Letters To

1.Minty (G3)

2.Funshine Bear, Wish Bear & Tenderheart Bear (Nelvana CGI Care Bears films)

3.Optimus Prime (Armada)

4.Lady Penelope & Parker

5.Alan, Brains or Tin Tin Kyrano

6.K9

7.Orko (2002)

8.Agumon, Gatomon or Gabumon

9.Jetfire (Cybertron)

10.Brum

When Gemini Gives Me A Picture For My Next DVD Choice...

A T T Retro Review: Doctor Who: The Horns Of Nimon

At first glance, The Horns Of Nimon might seem like a very boring vintage Doctor Who story to you guys, with just the Fourth Doctor, Ramona and no one else to accompany them. However, once you see K9 with them, you're SO IN! And that's what makes these kinds of Doctor Who Tom Baker DVDs so special to me - not only is Baker great as Doctor Four, and John Leeson as K9 too, but this studio-bound story is much more soothing than the later filmed-on-location stories starring David Tennant. The Blue Peter documentary that accompanies it makes it much more fun, as it brings us back to a time when CBBC wasn't all about algorithm, and they weren't like "WATCH IPLAYER OR WE'LL RIP YOUR HEAD OFF!"

And I rank this DVD 10 out of 10 Jelly Babies.

A T T Retro Review: Doctor Who & The Macra Terror

Using lost audio files from the archives, the missing Doctor Who four part adventure The Macra Terror featuring The Second Doctor and his pals Jamie, Ben and Polly, is lovingly crafted and animated by Sun & Moon Productions, aka the studio behind those ripoffs of Hey Duggee and Yakka Dee. However, I have to admit that the mix of modern animation and old studio-recorded dialogue recorded live back in the '60s is a bit eerie and creepy, but enjoyable. If you've had enough of Creature Comforts and want an action adventure animation with voices recorded on set, then this is the cartoon for you!

And I rank this DVD 5 out of 5 Macra pincers.

10 Things From T T Retro To Watch To Achieve Your Archie Stamp

In case you didn't know, Archie is the cute pug I've met at T T Retro yesterday. He's so cuddly and friendly, and loves sniffing at customers' feet!

1.Thunderbirds

2.Stingray

3.Captain Scarlet

4.Doctor Who (vintage stories)

5.BBC Narnia

6.Rocko's Modern Life

7.Buck Rogers

8.Top Cat

9.Andy Pandy (VHS)

10.My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic

The Dubstep Terror

In the cold vacuum of Space, dubstep is outlawed, but the Second Doctor AKA Two along with his companions Polly, Jamie, Vinyl, Octavia and Pinkie Pie head off to a planet named Skrill, where everyone parties like there's no tomorrow...but beware the Macra, he doesn't like loud dubstep and prefers easy listening.

Can Two and his friends use the power of friendship to change its mind?

Happiness List 16/4/26: Old Nigg

1.Inspired magic

2.Old Nigg Church

3.Collecting eggs

4.A new livestream

5.Ministry Of Mayhem (TV series)

6.Morning workouts

7.Making an omelette by myself

8.Posting letters at night

9.K9 (Doctor Who character)

10.Shalimar (perfume)

Party-Palzooa Day 14: The Musical Doctor

Sci Fi DVD Search

How Far In Grizzlyville?: Jamie's School Dinners

I have started reading Grizzly Tales: Gruesome Grown Ups, and the first story, Jamie's School Dinners, was gross and absolutely horrifying at the same time. It made me want to have actual chicken nuggets, no matter how the story portrayed children who only have one thing for meals every day.

When I got up to the bit where Jamie had chicken drumsticks, I was immediately hooked, because the main villain, Ambrosine, was stuffing him up as plump as who everyone calls him now, a 'little goose'. To make matters worse, Jamie's parents' health and concern for their now-heavyweight son deteriorate with every day that goes on, and as Jamie eats countless weights of food, he develops yellow zits on his face, and grows mushrooms all around his neck! Yeuck!

But, I am glad Amazon Kindle had annotations, so I could deliver my own thoughts on the story. Speaking of which, there is a part where the narrator tells us about a spoof of Doctor Who called Doctor Which. And what did I toggle in the annotations box?

"Ooh, burn!"

Typical sci-fi fan on a detox. Anyway, Ambrosine lures the now-obese Jamie towards her island, where she cooks him with horrid, nasty things usually taken out of healthy food for kids, mainly the e-numbers you'd find in Pink Wafers, until Jamie explodes.

The story ends on a dark note as Jamie's parents forget everything about their son, because he is served to another schoolboy in another part of the country during lunchtime, implying that he is about to meet the same fate as our morbidly-weight-gaining hero.

Now, I am not like Jamie, if you can ask me how I keep myself healthy and clean. I have a morning and nightly skincare routine, I put cream on my itchy and stingy spots which frequently appear on my body, and I shower regularly, not to mention I eat a variety of things for every meal, not just chicken nuggets and cheeseburgers.

So please, parents, if you see a child with an eating disorder, don't tell him if his parents offered him their brains. Instead, ask him about his hygiene, habits and diet. You might be able to offer some advice to his parents...but do they have the brains to take it all in?

To be continued...

SILENCE IS GOLDEN!

K9's Guide To An AI Made Recipe

K9: Greetings, humans, my mistress last night has been dreaming of me protecting her while she sleeps, and now, with my encouragement, she's made a nice, warm breakfast - not just for herself, but for her mother.

Quilly Bird: What happened?

K9: Well, blue bird, she got out her phone and asked my loyal friend ChatGPT to give her a recipe for a microwavable cereal in a mug - Shreddies. She did well, of course - she poured in the cereal, then the milk, and cooked it for about 30 Earth seconds. And then, viola - a nice, nutritious breakfast.

Angelmouse: What about her mum? Surely she must be made breakfast too!

K9: Winged mouse, it's my pleasure to tell you that my mistress poured and made coffee and made a microwavable cereal especially for her mother. She called her an 'absolute angel'. SAVE TO MEMORY: Absolute angel. *Twinkling noise*

Angelmouse: With a thingamajig! Hey, K9, can I take over?

K9: Affirmative. I needed a break anyway.

Angelmouse: We all really have to hand it to my friend for making such a nice breakfast, not just for her health, but for her Mum too. She's been so tired after looking after the old bag, and she was so worried when she started spending time on screens - for 7 years!

*Quilly gasps dramatically*

Angelmouse: But now, she's learning how to do new things, and it's all thanks to two magic words from you know who:

DIGITAL DETOXING!

Quilly: Aren't you forgetting something, Angelmouse?

Angelmouse: Oh, and not to mention everyone else she'd like to give thanks to: her mum, her support workers and also ChatGPT for helping her along the way. Not to mention all of us - her favourite characters - we helped her, didn't we, everyone?

ALL MY FAVOURITE CHARACTERS: YEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSS!!

A Poem About K9's Soppy Side

When K9 gets tickled under his chin

He falls down and goes all soppy

He spins all around growling loudly

And attracts the attention of Floppy!

It's Sci-Fi Time!

Timelines Of Nature: The Most Disgusting Book DK Ever Produced

So yesterday I had shouted too much and needed some time in my room, so after five minutes, and while the rest of the troop were out, I went back out again to find the most astonishing sight. Had my matriarchal leader bought another copy of Timelines Of Everything? Ah ah ah, she had bought something entirely different: Timelines Of Nature. Knowing it will contain soothing pictures of nature I ran into the living room and took a peek.

But what I saw next will shock the life out of you and run screaming from the room you have a computer in. Reader discretion is advised:

MOUSE CORPSES!

*Bluey screaming*

EATEN BY WASPS AND OTHER INSECTS!

K9: No! What a gross suggestion!

AND REAL LIFE SCARY INSECT PICTURES!

KYLE: Ah! Gross!

So, on behalf of my tastes and suggestive preferences, I must tell you that if the BAFTAs or Oscars were to hand out an award for the most disgusting book ever produced, DK would probably get that title before anyone else got it.

Luckily, I did find some solutions to this horribly published and drawn book: My Incredible World, a nice picture book series that features less gross pictures and facts aimed at people who are sensitively soft, like me. Also, there are other books from DK that don't feature gross content or pictures like that god-forsaken book.

So if you are to ever encounter a book like this, I suggest you throw it on a bonfire in the garden and watch as it blows up before your eyes. If you don't, then it along with Toonami's god-forsaken anime Uzumaki will keep you up at night forever with chills and night sickness until you become weak from vomiting.

DK, ARE YOU READING THIS?!

The Best Christmas Trip Out Ever

I take Brains, Alan, Tin Tin, Bluey, Bingo, K9, Twiki and Marvin The Paranoid Android on a trip to the big city to do some artistic Christmas shopping at Hobbycraft. It's their first time, and they look around to see all the wonderful sights and smells - Bluey also sees someone a bit like her on some of the products, and I meet a new friend - a pup in a wheelchair named Mousse, who is disabled. Mousse and his carer Twinkle agree to join us, and we all have a nice, filling Grinch meal from McDonald's before we fantasise being on a desert island and make a few stops at Home Bargains and Tesco during dusk on the way home. 

A Journey Of Surprises

Alan, Brains, Tin Tin, Twiki, K9, Marvin The Paranoid Android and I go for a walk in the forest, but as it gets darker, we don’t notice the mischievous Starlight Glimmer is changing the signs to new directions, and soon, much to her frustration, we discover surprises are the better part of any journey.

Mr Unwin's Cauldron

Alan, Brains, Tin Tin, K9, Twiki, Marvin The Paranoid Android and I are looking for a place to stay overnight during a snowstorm which causes us to lose our way back to Tracy Island. We find ourselves in a cosy coven where Father Stanley Unwin, a wizard priest, brews up some warm tea and hot chocolate which comfortably puts us to sleep in a soft, comfortable bedtime routine.

Who Left That There?

When the Blue Peter set is closed for the night, Alan, Brains, Tin Tin, K9, Twiki and Marvin The Paranoid Android and I sneak on and find some brightly coloured construction paper John Noakes and the other presenters left behind. Knowing K9 has been on the show before, we try our hand at making the biggest Thunderbird paper mache craft ever, through upbeat music and teamwork.

Survivors Through Space & Time

Alan, Brains, Tin Tin, K9, Marvin The Paranoid Android, Twiki and I all end up on a surreal wasteland consisting of post-apocalyptic style scenarios with no sign of life at all after borrowing the Doctor's TARDIS when he feels ill with Space Flu. We head off on an incredible low-stakes adventure across this new and bizarre place, trying to make sense of where we are and how we can bring life to it.