“Attention, NASA executives,” announced the head of NASA urgently during one of their boring meetings.
“Megatron is going to strike the Earth any minute, and we need the best of the best to take him down. So far, no human dead or alive has managed to conquer such a dreaded force as the Decepticons. Most of them have taken over every single TV channel in the UK, and that was when everyone was obsessed with Michael Bay’s Transformers. What we need to do is rely on someone not human.”
“Someone not human….hmmmm…hummmmm…” went the executives, deep in thought over who they could hire. But who could they hire? Not the doctor, he’s gone downhill thanks to Rose and his friend Mickey. What about Arthur Dent? Nah, too wimpy. Erm….Buck Rogers? He won’t be able to take on those stupidly realistic Decepticons alone.
Suddenly, one executive jumped out of his seat.
“I know! What about Optimus Prime, Furaha and Orko?”
Instead of bursting into creepy fits of laughter, the executives just shouted angrily and threw cans of beer at the suggestive executive.
“Don’t be ridiculous, Thomas!” cried the head of NASA once the noise died down,
“Optimus Prime has defeated the Autobots countless times. In fact, there had been many different versions of him who defeated many different versions of Megatron in the past few years the Transformers were around.”
“Two words, sir.” said Thomas. He put one finger up, and hissed:
“Shut, up.”
For a moment, there was silence. Then all the executives started clapping furiously.
“Woohoo!” they cried in chorus, “You tell him, Tommy!”
“But wait, how do we actually get Optimus to fight the Decepticons again?” asked one executive. The thunderous ovation came to an abrupt halt as he continued:
“The Armada version doesn’t like violence, not at all. Maybe we could hire the Cybertron version?”
The executives gave fierce, silent looks and a noise-free, unified thumbs down. One executive even said:
“Don’t be silly, this series has ripped off Dragon Ball Z countless times. Who knows how many times it tried to reference it according to fans?”
“No no no,” said the executive, waving his arms as if trying to direct traffic.
“What I’m saying is, we’ll try to surprise the Armada version of Optimus and show him what for by forcing him and his two kids into saving us all from the Decepticons.”
“Hey!” cried one executive,
“I never knew Optimus had kids - wait. Maybe I know now - Furaha and Orko. His ‘adopted’ kids. Furaha being the little kid with fur all over her body, Orko being the one rescued from Eternia!”
“So let’s make sure he gets to rally everyone in Eternia or not…” hissed the head NASA executive, a cheekily evil grin spreading across his face like a skin disease.
At dawn, a huge rocket was parked outside Furaha, Orko and Optimus’ house. Made with stainless steel and all the advanced technology NASA could ever hold ever in all their lives, it measured 23 stellar cycles long, just enough to beat a skyscraper.
A small metallic hatch opened, and out rose a megaphone. From its speaker came a deafening air raid siren. From inside Furaha, Orko and Optimus’ house, the three woke up, but weren’t at all bothered by it.
“Morning, you two,” yawned Optimus, stretching out his sleepiness from the night before. Furaha and Orko yawned out their morning greetings and Furaha leapt onto the duvet, stretching cat-like and causing a few scratches.
Optimus was the first to hear the air raid siren.
“Hmmmm, what a strange way to wake a carer and his kids up.”
“It doesn’t help that there’s a huge black towering thing outside our house. It’s turning everything dark!” noticed Furaha, pointing to the shaded window outside.
Optimus looked at his gargantuan bedside table. Furaha and Orko had a glass of water each, small compared to what else was on the table. You see, Optimus himself had a copy of an IDW publishing comic, and it was so tiring and boring he read it before he went to bed anyway. The cover picture showed two people escaping from a nuclear blast caused by a space rocket.
It proved too disturbing for the feeble minds of Furaha and Orko, but luckily, something as cataclysmic as this wasn’t happening today.
“Right then,” said Optimus when his sleep had finally been shaken off, “Time for our morning bath.”
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