The Scream Street Spooktacular Joke Book is one of the best Christmas presents I received last month. Not only does it contain side-splitting jokes, but it also gives us a glimpse into more detail on life on the street, from food to books to music. They're also the inspiration for some short scripted skits I'll do based on each joke. I did three all week, so now I'll talk about the ones I will do sometime soon.
10.Farp's Horrible Social Life. This skit shows a bundle of messages on Farp's social media account saying horrible things about the dreaded Season 2. These examples include, for Bad Scare Day, 'They forced me to wear wigs made from gassed werewolves - I can feel their flesh, and blood is leaking on my head!' and for The Mummies' Curse, 'I don't want Niles and Sir Otto's mum to get married - there never has been a wedding in Scream Street! I want to see the episode where Sir Otto's mum just tortured my friends and the mayor, just like in December 2015'. It then shows Farp in his underground abode, staring at his phone and covered with bruises and scars. His social media account has no likes and comments. He drops his phone, falls onto his bed and begins crying, before we see his account again. A charity called PETM (People For The Ethical Treatment Of Monsters) puts up an apology saying they've taken down his account for causing offence to those who love Season 1 of Scream Street, and are giving Farp a new life as they speak.
9.Zombie Underwear. At a fancy dress party, Doug arrives wearing underwear on his head. Some of the guests are shocked, others start laughing. Bandit then arrives and asks Doug to wear his jocks. Doug refuses, but the other guests begin chanting "Zombie Jocks!" until the zombie surfer dude reluctantly agrees, and boy do they smell horrible. "You know what else smells horrible?" asks Dixon. "Mr. Heeler's stinky feet!"
8.Cleo's Rap. I've always had a connection between The Worst Witch and Luella, as Mildred and Luella are both from the same kind, but since Cleo started hanging out with the trainee witch in episodes of Season 2 of Scream Street, I feel they were drifting far apart from each other, as I am drifting far apart from Cleo. So, in this short, Cleo blurts out a rude, insolent rap about Mildred to keep Luella away from her, as she doesn't belong in the show, until Mildred appears and scolds Cleo for breaking show peace, interrupting the rap entirely.
7.Time To Die. This isn't a script, it's more like a song/poem, based on how I felt when Scream Street returned to CBBC last October. The song has speaking bits, telling us about the cruelty an organisation named A.R.F forces upon the residents of Scream Street. The song mainly tells the story of me, Luke, Resus, Cleo, Luella, Six, Dig and Lulu, who were forced to live in a house made of flowers after our parents are killed for experimentation. After a few happy and relieved months, A.R.F sets the house alight, causing us to run for it. For a while, we are taken in by Nana, who feeds us and takes us for walks, until A.R.F kidnaps us and takes us overseas. However, we manage to move our crate into the ocean, and we end up in the jungles of India. We end up spending the next few days trying to survive, until a beaten and bruised Dixon stumbles in, warning us about an A.R.F organisation in that country. A.R.F finally kidnaps Luella and kills her, before we too are kidnapped and taken to a lab. Stripped naked from the moment we ended up in the jungle, we are forced to watch as Six is experimented on and killed, then when my time comes, Luke becomes so enraged he transforms into a werewolf, destroying his cage, freeing me and my friends and letting us escape, leaving me, Luke, Resus, Cleo, Dig and Lulu as the only survivors. We hold a candlelit funeral for Six and Luella before we start a new life, with the A.R.F laboratory destroyed by Luke's werewolf. This song also talks about how cruel CBBC was to ignore Scream Street and move onto other stuff, and I desperately want Little Big Town to perform the song, with Jim Howick, the voice of Luke's dad, narrating the speaking bits...if I can.
6.Adoption Shelter. This will be more heartbreaking than the last entry. This short takes place in an adoption centre, where instead of dogs, CBBC characters desperately want to be adopted. As other CBBC characters like Tyler, Jody, Hetty Feather and Shaun The Sheep get adopted, people leave behind Luke, Resus and Cleo, who are all alone in their cage. One day, I come along and decide to adopt them, and basically we live happily ever after.
5.No Dinner Ladies At The Big School. Luke, Resus, Cleo, Mia, Captain (they both appeared in Barky Boats), Jasper and Charlie are having lunch at school. They talk about the relief of no dinner ladies at their school, giving them freedom to choose home food, then talk about what they would put in their packed lunches, like Mia has mango fruit juice and Charlie has strawberry break time milk, just like his close friend Pepper. Now this one is sure to make you smile.
4.Luella's Bear Dance. Luella loves going to sleep with her teddy Mr. Sparklenose, even though she's too old for her other soft toys. One morning, she wakes up to see her teddy had turned into a large brown bear which growls and roars at her, until Luella puts on some jazz music and taps about with him until he transforms back into the cuddly teddy he once was. This is way better than Toy Scary, I guarantee...
3.Cake Guards. Uncle Stripe, Muffin, Socks, Dixon and Sir Otto are asked the guard Margaret Sneer's cake while she goes out to run an errand, but as they guard it they become bored and...they eat it all up.
2.Witch Puppy. Envious over Dig, my siblings' pet dog which I also love to play with, Luella casts a spell to get herself a puppy using magic clay and glitter, and as a result, a bouncy yellow Labrador puppy appears before her. Luella spends the day playing with her new dog in the park, feeding it, giving it a bath and taking it for walks, even taking it to bed with her, until the next day she wakes up to see her puppy gone. She begins to cry, until Eefa reassures her that the Pet Reanimation Spell only lasts one day.
1.Mummy Chips. At a restaurant, Cleo begins to dip her french fries into her chocolate muffin since it has a gooey chocolate centre. I try to do the same, by dipping my own french fries into my strawberry milkshake. At the other table, Lucky and his dad notice and try to dip their pizza slices into their juice, much to the frustration of Lucky's dad's wife Shanelle.
And now for a joke:
How do witches flavour their stews?
With a little bit of sauce-ry!
Now imagine Luella and Eefa preparing soup in a Winter setting together.
Is anyone else awoken by the fireworks last night? I went back to sleep in the end. Anyway, to celebrate the coming New Year, it's time to make a confetti popper so you can let lots of little coloured stuff out!
4.Luella's Bear Dance. Luella loves going to sleep with her teddy Mr. Sparklenose, even though she's too old for her other soft toys. One morning, she wakes up to see her teddy had turned into a large brown bear which growls and roars at her, until Luella puts on some jazz music and taps about with him until he transforms back into the cuddly teddy he once was. This is way better than Toy Scary, I guarantee...
3.Cake Guards. Uncle Stripe, Muffin, Socks, Dixon and Sir Otto are asked the guard Margaret Sneer's cake while she goes out to run an errand, but as they guard it they become bored and...they eat it all up.
2.Witch Puppy. Envious over Dig, my siblings' pet dog which I also love to play with, Luella casts a spell to get herself a puppy using magic clay and glitter, and as a result, a bouncy yellow Labrador puppy appears before her. Luella spends the day playing with her new dog in the park, feeding it, giving it a bath and taking it for walks, even taking it to bed with her, until the next day she wakes up to see her puppy gone. She begins to cry, until Eefa reassures her that the Pet Reanimation Spell only lasts one day.
1.Mummy Chips. At a restaurant, Cleo begins to dip her french fries into her chocolate muffin since it has a gooey chocolate centre. I try to do the same, by dipping my own french fries into my strawberry milkshake. At the other table, Lucky and his dad notice and try to dip their pizza slices into their juice, much to the frustration of Lucky's dad's wife Shanelle.