Spy mission log:
So Tailmon, Agumon and I were at a wild party at Club Rainbow, and we were so partied out we might've had the time to take a little break. However, we noticed Chippy leaving with Cherry and followed her to see what was going on - and to our shock, we found a drowned tramp!
The next morning, I told my mummy, Sherlock Penelope, everything, and she went to the hospital to find out why the tramp had drowned in the river. I was disturbed by the sight of bloody bandages all over the victim's faces, but still, it wasn't something to worry about, not even the massive hooks holding meat.
While on our way to the harbour we met a homeless girl named Judo, who had an actual baby puppy in her pram alongside a bottle of stale wine. She said she used the stale wine to get wasted even though she was only six years old. Then we met local fisherman Maynard, who lived with his wife and his baby son. I had a good time helping them sort out the fish and cook them for their tea, but Penelope was wondering if Maynard was taking spy agents in for slavery.
Later, we reported all this to S.P.Y 'Quarters, and were assigned to search an abandoned pharmacist for clues since the tramp worked at the pharmacist years before he drowned. It was old, dusty and whitewashed from ceiling to floor, but then Lady Penelope had to grab me and drag me out of here since a huge rain of asbestos fell from the ceiling. Once we reported what we found back to Jeff Tracy, head of S.P.Y 'Quarters, we went home since the working day was over.
After a long, warm bath and a nourishing dinner, we went to sleep in our soft, cosy bed...however, Sherlock Penelope was having a hallucogenic dream about stale wine and the hallucinations it can give you. And they were pretty terrifying indeed! Sherlock Penelope woke up screaming and sick, and had to vomit for almost 2 hours before Parker could call an ambulance and take her to hospital. It was up to me to solve the case alone.
First I went to meet Mrs Tibble and the Tibble Twins, who were constantly fighting over which toy was theirs', or, who got to pet the baby budgies first. While they went to the old vehicle museum, Mrs Tibble explained to me that things haven't been the same since CBBC got Americanised by the government, who wanted programmes which aren't of the relaxing British source people wanted. This is also the result of too much airtime of Malory Towers on there, and CBBC turned it into a loud American sitcom, which took up too much airtime on the channel, like the cartoons on there, the same way Teen Titans Go took up all the schedule time on Cartoon Network every, single, day. And let me tell you the bad news: CBBC is slowly becoming a Boomerang/Pop ripoff, and they might even get the voiceover from Boomerang and Pop to do continuity announcements - in an American accent! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! I was so shocked that I ran out of the house crying.
I then went to the locomotive museum and saw all of Gerry Anderson's hand made vehicles on display - the Thunderbirds, Stingray, Fireball XL5, Gabriel...everything. Then I met Agent G.B. (or Ginger, from Chicken Run), who explained to me that Americanisation of British kids' TV wasn't my fault. We had a long talk about how the kids' TV industry was slowly turning to the American side thanks to too many budget cuts, and how PBS Kids will be shutting down soon. Upset by this news, I hugged Agent G.B. out of dispair.
American kids need less brainrot more than ever, and it was a generation that was trusted by parents and beloved by children in America for years and years and years. It has been around ever since I was born. And CBBC hasn't progressed well too. When CITV vanished in 2023, the trouble started. Don't you prefer the days when there were good shows instead of bad, cheap American cartoons?
Ditch the Americanisation.
Go British.
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