Dear Children Everywhere

Dear children everywhere,

I’m so glad you found my letter there

On your doorstep, wet in the rain

I thought it’d never come down again

I call all of you to answer my plea

To help us save British kids’ TV

The ‘50s started things quite simply

With Muffin The Mule and Andy Pandy

The ‘60s wasn’t that obscene

With shows like Clangers and Camberwick Green

It’s also an era of puppet sci fi

As Thunderbirds took to the sky

The ‘70s made us count on our fingers

How many times we’ve seen the Phantom Flan Flinger

Blue Peter and Magpie were popular back then

So was Morph and Tony Hart’s pens

Consumerism ruled in every ‘80s house

But at least we still had Danger Mouse

And Postman Pat and Pigeon Street

While Transformers and He Man stirred up heat

The ‘90s were full of colour and fun

With Noddy, Fireman Sam, Pingu and Brum

We boogied with the Teletubbies as they got up to dance

And we even gave Farthing Wood a chance!

In 2002 CBeebies and CBBC

Launched to all our excited glee

But little did we know it’ll get weaker

While we were cheering on Tracy Beaker

All kinds of shows, so much to choose,

But Peppa Pig made our parents lose

Their children’s tantrums and screaming and fights

For a Peppa Pig playset or nightlight

Then CBBC aired some shows

As worse as Dick & Dom’s bungalow

Gimme A Break and Undercover Dad

And from there, it just got bad

You started switching to Youtube from TV

You just like nursery rhymes, you see

Singing the same songs like Baby Shark

To keep parents awake in the dark

In ‘13, Nick Jr had a goal

To make a show named Paw Patrol

It and Peppa aired non stop for days

And other preschool channels forced consumerism ways

They made each show entirely CGI

That’s fast and loud as a sugar high

Now, let’s go back to CBBC

From ‘19, things weren’t as they seemed

At the start, Almost Never was set

To test out iPlayer’s new boxsets

They had drama marathons all year long

Was it British still? Well, we were wrong!

And from the pandemic, things got worse

There wasn’t a penny in a businessman’s purse

The word I say will make you revolt and retort,

For today’s fun word is: IMPORT.

American cartoons took over CBBC

Marking the end of CITV

And it got worse for CBeebies,

It focused on Bluey and parenting duties

And the problem with kids’ TV these days

Is there’s no quiet songs or stories or games

Everything is loud and way too fast

But with your help, this won’t last

We must stand with our hands joined together

To prove handmade, quiet shows are better

It takes a lot to make wrongs right,

For new kids’ TV is an awful sight

So ditch the brainrot and the loud fast pace

By signing this form like tying a shoelace

And together, we can make kids’ TV

Gentle and slow like it used to be.

Thanks for reading,

Daria Anton

Head of POAIBP

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