Father Unwin's Guide To Being Called

Hello, Father Unwin here. As you may have noticed in episode 3 of my show, I have been 'called'. But it's actually me going on a mission. In my mind, God's been calling me to save my appetite for when the job is done. For who needs a telephone in Heaven when you've got spirits voicing your thoughts in your head? Here are six tips on how to know when you've been 'called'.

1. Understand your instincts. Just when you thought you would have a boiled egg and some toast soldiers after a nice night's sleep, someone from Heaven calls to you, and says you have a destiny to follow. If you have that kind of destiny, follow it - if you're a painter, do some art. If you're a dreamer, think up some new ideas.
2. Notice some sensations in your body. Everyone knows human bodies can't talk, only human mouths. But if you notice some tingling sensations in certain parts of your body, it means they're trying to tell you something. If you did your foot in over Christmas for instance, then you might know the holiday season is a time to relax. If you feel that emotional nostalgic feeling in your chest, it may mean you're missing something from your childhood so much.
3. Notice some signs in your life that may tell you something. Even when you watch your favourite TV show or movie, notice that everything around you is a warning for you to get out and do something that'll change your life forever. For example, if you pick up a stone in the supermarket car park and imagine it's a brand new universe, then you'll be into doodling new worlds inside everyday things. That's what colouring books are for - to inspire you in every way.
4. Learn from everyday experiences and unannounced life changes. When my life changed the moment I inherited Professor Humbert's shrinking machine, I knew that I would bring a certain peaceful aura to everyone around me - including every single dastardly enemy agent I've faced around me. If something happens unannounced in your life, like the death of a beloved family member or moving to a new home, it means that there's a new chapter in the novel that's called your life, and you're ready to live it, no matter what you face. Go out and live it.
5. Pray every night asking for advice. When prayers are said for my friend Slomo when he was blasted out of the air vent of a spaceship one time, I was the one who lead everyone in releasing their hopes and dreams for Slomo. Tonight, before you go to bed, pray to our lord and saviour for some advice on what to do with your life next if you're stuck with an incredible dilemma you can't face alone. It's not just people you have to turn to, it's those you may think exist but are only in your head.
6. Don't be afraid to face new challenges. Whether it's a brand new shopping outlet or a new activity you haven't done since you were a wee lad, never be afraid to jump right in or get your hands dirty with paint or chocolate mess. And if you want to write a story, dive right in - it doesn't matter how perfect you want it to be, it's not just for publishing, it's for fun and excitement only.

Speaking of which, I met Lauren Faust and she told me that advice about having fun while creating worlds or writing stories, which is what she did while doing related content about those cute little colourful magical pony beings. So, I believe in you - when you get called, it's about time you answered your destiny. Without a destiny, you can never achieve your dreams.

If you can find it, I think you can handle it with ease.