Hi! I'm Peggy, Horse's new girlfriend. Recently, I've been adopted by some kind of autistic girl who thought she was a Pegasister - someone who can brush my hair and care for my puppy pal. She ain't, she's my new rider. Let me tell you about her exhausting day.
There were people screaming on the radio, but my new rider didn't mind. She had MFR on all the time, so there's no reason we can't be bothered with the same amount of choices we get each day. Anyway, first they went to Smyths, where they enjoyed a Starbucks hot chocolate and a brownie. Then in the support worker went to get the ideal pony - me, the most magical pegasus in the world! Sybil was delighted with her purchase, and I made sparkly sounds and music too. Ain't I a glitzy pegasi or what?! She also let the support worker buy a birthday card. That was kind.
When we went to Lidl to get a catalogue, my new friend made an Instagram live feed to address everyone in the world about me and her distaste for Netflix, which of course means pushing the upsetting original shows this grungy streaming service produces - even its kids shows are too hard to bare. Luckily, I got to hear about her new friends - Orko, Mangey Tails, Frizzle, Alpha 9, Izzy, Pipp, Ork-O, Walter, Donny, Llama and Nelly Gnu. They're all nice people, you should meet them someday.
Then off we went for pizza. This time she got a small pizza, a small amount of chicken wings and fries and a small portion of cookies. The result? Time skip!
She was so full up with a fluffy brain she quit eating dinner and just drank water. Luckily, she's going out on a walk with her next support worker this weekend, so I'll spread a little pegasus magic on her achy legs should she call out for me. For more information on how pegasi work, call
0800 571 2784
Or go to:
WWW.Smyths.com/AdoptAPegasi
WARNING: Site and phone number not real.
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